Alright folks, grab your coffee and pull up a chair, because we need to talk about the “four horsemen of the apocalypse” for farmers—weather, price, pestilence, and disease. Picture it: a group of farmers leaning on their pickups, swapping stories, and what are they always griping about? Yep, you guessed it—weather, price, pestilence, and disease. It’s like the farmer’s version of a bad horror movie, but without the popcorn.
Let’s start with weather. Mother Nature seems to have a twisted sense of humor. She loves to keep us on our toes. Droughts, floods, hurricanes—she loves throwing curveballs. One day you’re praying for rain, the next you’re building an ark. Just when you think you’ve got a handle on things, she shakes it up again. Farmers spend half their lives watching the sky and hoping for just the right amount of rain, praying hail doesn’t hit, or that a tornado won’t touch down. It’s like she’s playing a never-ending game of “Will They Survive This?” And we’re the unwilling contestants.
Let me tell you about straight-line winds and derechos. We’ve been hit by these bad boys two years in a row, both in June. The first one, we got lucky—just one tree lost a huge limb that landed on our house. No biggie, right? But the second one… oh boy, did it wreak havoc. Eight giant shade trees, half our rabbit cages, the entire garden, the cucumber arch, berry bushes, and multiple fences—gone. Flattened. It was like a mini-apocalypse on our farm. But here’s the kicker: we picked ourselves up, rebuilt, and even found a way to use the downed wood for future projects. Nature’s got jokes, but sometimes, she gives us the resources to bounce back stronger.
Then there’s price. Talk about a rollercoaster. Ask any farmer, and they’ll tell you the same old story. You can grow the best crop in the world, pour your heart and soul into it, and then watch the market tank. It’s like playing roulette with your livelihood. Meanwhile, the middleman is laughing all the way to the bank. It feels like we’re stuck in a never-ending game of Monopoly, and we’re always landing on the “Pay Rent” spaces.
Now, we haven’t personally battled this horseman on our farm, but let me tell you a story from a friend’s farm. They decided to go all-in on growing specialty pumpkins one year. These pumpkins were beautiful—big, round, and picture-perfect. Just as they were about to cash in on their hard work, the market price plummeted. They were left with a mountain of pumpkins and a sinking feeling in their stomachs. But, being the resourceful folks they are, they pivoted and sold the pumpkins as Halloween decorations. It wasn’t the windfall they hoped for, but hey, they turned a potential disaster into a festive win.
Now, pestilence—that’s a fancy word for all the creepy crawlies that have it out for your crops. Fungus, molds, grasshoppers, you name it. They’re like those unwanted houseguests who just won’t leave. You finally get rid of one problem, and another one pops up. It’s a never-ending battle, and it’s enough to drive anyone up the wall. You wake up one morning to find your crops looking healthy and thriving, only to discover a new pest infestation by the afternoon. It’s enough to make you want to scream, “Why can’t you bother someone else for a change?”
Are raccoons considered pestilence? You bet they are. We’ve battled them for years, especially with our chickens and rabbits. They tear through wooden walls, rip chicken wire apart, decimate flocks, and even pull rabbits through wire cages. It’s like living in a constant episode of “Raccoons Gone Wild.” But last year, we had a small victory. We upgraded our enclosures, added extra layers of protection, and set up humane traps. Caught a few raccoons and relocated them far, far away. It’s a never-ending battle, but this time, we came out on top.
And finally, disease. The average farmer lives in a constant state of paranoia, wondering if the next outbreak will wipe out their crop, herd, or flock. Bird flu? Yeah, that’s the latest bogeyman, but there’s always a new villain waiting in the wings. It’s like living in a bad soap opera, and you just can’t change the channel.
Take your pick—coccidiosis in both birds and rabbits, mycoplasma in the birds. Over the years, we’ve faced them all. It’s like a revolving door of farm illnesses. The coccidiosis hit us hard; we lost many animals, spent hundreds of dollars on treatments, and endured countless headaches. The mycoplasma brought its own share of heartbreak and frustration, costing us many birds. But we’ve overcome both. Nine times out of ten, if disease hits your farm, it’s due to human error somewhere. In our case, the coccidiosis didn’t get caught in time in a new rabbit and contaminated our ground, spreading to the rest of our herd. The mycoplasma came from a bird bought at auction that wasn’t properly quarantined. Better believe that quarantine procedures are followed to the letter now for all species!
Any one of these horsemen, at aggressive scale, can sink a farming operation. It’s what every article about agriculture seems to focus on, but it’s a reality we face every day. We joke about it, we gripe about it, but we also roll up our sleeves and deal with it. Because that’s what farmers do—we adapt, we persevere, and we keep going, no matter what.
So, here’s to the farmers who lean on their pickups and talk about these age-old problems. The ones who weather the storms, navigate the market, battle pests, and guard against disease. It’s not an easy life, but it’s the one we’ve chosen. And at the end of the day, sitting around the farm table and sharing these stories reminds us that we’re not in this alone.
Got any stories or gripes about the “four horsemen” on your farm? Let’s hear them. We’re all in this together, facing the ups and downs of farm life.
