I grew up in a world where chores weren’t optional.
Wood had to be stacked. Animals had to be fed. Gardens had to be weeded.
And if you didn’t do it, you learned the hard way—because survival didn’t wait for excuses.
But kids today? They live in a different world.
One where discipline is questioned.
One where parents are monitored.
One where the second a child complains, the system shows up at your door.
My son has struggled with behavioral issues most of his life.
We’ve worked hard—years of therapy, consistency, and boundaries—to get him to a better place.
He’s grounded to his room after chores and homework.
But he’s clever. He figured out that volunteering for extra chores buys him more time outside his room.
So tonight, he joined me in de-shelling corn for the birds.
We turned it into a race, laughed a little, and got the job done.
But when I suggested heavier work—like cleaning out the porch wood racks and filling them with split wood—he said he’d rather be inside.
And here’s the kicker: I can’t push him the way my parents pushed me.
I can’t leave him outside until it’s done.
I can’t whip him for refusing.
Because if he tells a teacher, counselor, or behaviorist, suddenly DCS is knocking on my door.
So what happens?
Kids grow softer.
They learn to negotiate instead of endure.
They learn to complain instead of complete.
They learn that systems will swoop in to protect them from hard lessons, while parents are left powerless to teach resilience.
I’m not asking for cruelty.
I’m asking for balance.
For the right to raise children who understand that work is part of life, not punishment.
That chores build character, not trauma.
That responsibility is learned in the doing, not in the talking.
Because if we keep cushioning every discomfort, we’re raising a generation that won’t know how to split wood, feed animals, or stand firm when life gets hard.
And life will get hard.
So here’s my plea:
Let parents parent.
Let kids sweat a little.
Let work be work.
Because softness won’t stack the wood.
And softness won’t build the future.
